I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I hope mine doesn't look like that
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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