zippers are such a cool invention
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
