No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
Randomize
