I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Talk about an dramatic entrance, girl rolled up on a stolen bike and was wearing heels and a dress, through it on the ground and said "you guys want a bike?" Of course i jumped on that shit, any sane person would!
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Actually just remembered that solo cup full of scotch that random guy gave me for not farting on him. That's probably why
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
