Can we have unprotected sex soon?
Don't quote me on that, I'm a walking boner
I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
If you can't have hot, loud sex in a dorm for the last time ever, what can you do in this world?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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