I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
new rule: cockblock me if I have had over a fifth of jack. no matter what.
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
that blonde bartender and I racked up an impressive mini bar bill last night
Mini bar? Did you get a hotel room?
Yeah, the last thing I need right now is a chick with an insane clown posse tattoo knowing where I live
That’s legit
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