dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
do herpes really smell.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize
