You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
So I feel like I should feel objectified by your comment about my boobs but instead I just feel proud. 21ST CENTURY FEMINISM, BABY
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Randomize
