Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
you were holding her above your head singing Circle of Life in what i assume was a Simba reference. then she smacked her head on a bar light and the bouncers kicked you out
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize