As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
i wanna anger bang this girl behind me at work. she never shuts up with her annoying voice. but her boobs are phenom.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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