Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
why didn't you poke me back
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
once the "do it" chant starts, any shot at an even remotely dignified party experience is dead.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
