I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
i just want to cuddle, make out and maybe have a boob grabbed but no. someone has to have mono.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Randomize
