The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
This can only be settled by a dance off.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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