The maid of honor just puked.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
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