gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
my sister just canceled her nose job because she thought it would hurt too much
It'll hurt less than being alone
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
Randomize
