So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Cop gave me a ticket for public drunkedness, and then I convinced him to drive me back to the party
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I watched you fall asleep, sitting up, eating a cinnamon roll. You proceeded to wake up...smile at your cinnamon roll, ask it how it got into your hand and then began eating it again. You asked me if you were ridiculous last night, define ridiculous.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Randomize
