That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize