Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Randomize
