"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I look better un-naked...
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Told the cab driver to take me to narnia last night. Turns out there's a bar called narnia on the south side of town. We are in business
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
Randomize
