I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
Randomize
