I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
How do I go about this? "Hey, its my birthday in 40 minutes. Would you like to come over for some sex? Also, please bring snacks"?
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
You're too drunk for my bullshit, and i'm too sober to put up with yours. I have no idea how you expect to find middle ground here.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
