We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
I can't tell if the dead thing in the yard is a deer or the guy I slept with last night...
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
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