No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Randomize
