i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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