don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
I knew as soon as he opened a beer with his teeth to shotgun it that I was going to sleep with him. I'm never going home.
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
