Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
talk of her extensive whoreness has crossed oceans. thats impressive.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
The EMT told me when I left the ER "I'd like to take off your pants again and inspect your package. Just not during a medical emergency..." We're hooking up tonight.
Points for getting a hot hook up after getting a shard of glass in your thigh. Almost makes it worth it.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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