I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
my grandmother thought she vaccuumed up a quarter so she made me open the bag, dump it out on her front lawn, and dig through it. no quarter.
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I was scoping hash out of our weed jar with a spoon and I realized we need to buy actual utensils. This plastic shit is killing me I've broke 3 spoons
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize
