This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
you have to give me like a days notice for these kinds of things, you cant just call at 9 am and expect me to be sober
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I'm wearing red that night.
Noted, what shade?
Whore.
The only thing I accomplished today was naming the bag of wine I've been drinking
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
