I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
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