whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
we spent fifteen minutes trying to convince you that you weren't locked inside of your car
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
apparently when she asked me how drunk I was on a scale of 1-10, I answered "bitch I'm fabulous" and tried to do a sassy hairflip. but I have short hair.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
Randomize
