I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
We legit stopped the the game so that Jamie and I could throw up in the bushes, and then continue to play intramurals... this is what my life is coming to1
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I just typed "I've got a friend" and my phone autocompletes to "that's a dick appointment". What is my life.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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