She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
He puked in the middle of it and I still wasn't disappointed.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
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