Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
