Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
She's got an ass you could write the declaration of independence on in one line. Takes up three bar stools.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
Before he left he told me if his girlfriend ever finds out, she'll take us both to an alley and kill us.
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
Randomize