I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
