Pregnant stripper...not hot.
After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
between no blow jobs for the rest of his life, or no cheese for the rest of his life, he chose no blowjobs. ive never felt so bad about my bj abilities before
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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