Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Dude, the girl i fucked last night left wearing my high school musical shirt you bought me. she also left her panties here though.
The one with Zac Efrons face on it? You definitely got the short in of the stick. i'd rather have the shirt
fuck. yeah me too. i don't even think these panties would fit me
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I swear I only do things like fuck 19 yr olds just to hear how you laugh when I tell you.
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
I wish you'd make everyone's lives easier and do him already. Then we can get rid of him.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
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