See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
when the police officer said he was gonna take a picture of the car accident, you asked if you should pose on the hood
I can't really talk right now. I'm getting on a plane to Oregon to go give a guy a bj. I'll see you in three days.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Randomize
