Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
I have decided to cut my hair. This is based solely on the fact there is too much of it to clean vomit out every Sunday afternoon.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
This bird just went for my eyes. Does he think I'm dead???
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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