She said her name was "party"
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
Randomize
