I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
'TWAS BUT A GLORIOUS SIGHT. BITCHES.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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