turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
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