I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Randomize
