Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Can you get snapchat back so I can show you all the places I threw up in/on last night?
You used your chihuahua as a pillow screaming "HE'S A PILLOW AND A PET" and proceeded to puke in the dog bed
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Randomize
