How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Randomize
