her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
All I want in this world right now are Doritoessssss
OK. You going to get home safe? Who are you with?
Doritoesssssss
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
The highlight of the night was when he yelled "WAS THIS CONDOM MADE FOR TODDLERS??"
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize