if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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