Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(859): View more from Kentucky

Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.

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(308): View more from Nebraska

i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?

(1-978): View more from Massachusetts

Nah. I did too.

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(630): View more from Illinois

Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"

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(204): View more from Manitoba

I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover

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(205): View more from Alabama

I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over

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(952): View more from Minnesota

I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night

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(616): View more from Michigan

Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.

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(631): View more from New York

And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars

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