Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
WAKE UP. GET ME THE PILL. AND SAVE MY LIFE
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
That's cool, I just have to let the dogs out AND SO HELP ME GOD IF YOU TEXT ME BAHA MEN LYRICS WE ARE NOT FRIENDS.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize
