I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
I should have to wear a sign around the rest of the day so everyone knows the shame I feel.
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
I'm hungover and eating lunch at an elementary school. The children are barking. Litrealy barking, like dogs.
Love that I’m sending my uber driver a thank you message for taking me home via mcdonalds tonight before I’m messaging my date from tonight! Lol
Randomize
