oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I got drunk and threw up on a kid at the amusement park. I think they're pressing charges.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I love her so much that if I could have sex with her I wouldn't cuz my dick would feel out of place in such a perfect body/vagina
that blow job was not worth the clinginess that will follow
Sometimes when I see a shoe on the side of the road, I get a little depressed that I've never partied that hard.
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
