What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
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