whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I don't think I own any pants that haven't seen his bedroom floor anymore...
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
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